Four Months, Plus Some

I have started this post about 674 times in the past 4 days, some things come and some things just do not. And then I put it aside, and the whole "four months after graduation," thing kind of went out the window. So I am currently a 4 month plus a few odd days graduate of highschool. Wahoo!

I had this grand idea of a post to post exactly four months after graduation, I didn't know what it would be about, but it would just come- the ideas would flow and everything would fall into place. Kind of like my plans for after high school, I would live life and everything would fall into place.

Well see the issue is, I don't remember the date of graduation. And then, the dates get all freaky when you live across the world from the state you graduated in, so I do not know when to post this to make it exactly four months after I graduated, four months after I watched Allie give a sparkling senior speech, four months after I said goodbye to a whole slew of amazing humans- some more amazing and like-able than others, but nonetheless amazing. 

Approximately four months ago I became a graduate of Highland highschool. Throw words like cheesy and cliche at me and call it a day, but this was more of a start than it is an ending. Four months ago I knew 4 things:

1.) I would be moving to Malaysia in August

2.) Boys suck, like a lot

3.) I am really glad I wore the shoes I did because I did not have the unfortunate experience of stripper like heels sink into grass

4.) I had strep throat

Today, four months later (give or take a few days) I know 4 things:

1.) I am moving to Provo in January

2.) Boys suck when you enter high school, when you graduate high school, and after you graduate. It is their thing they're good at- they're good at sucking so there's that

3.) I do not need everyone that was in my life at the time of graduation to thrive and be happy, people have walked out of my life and padlocked the door shut, and I am okay with that, I know how to keep the people in my life that lift me up

4.) I actually did not have strep throat, I had a weird nasal sinus gross word medical lingo thing going on, probably an accumulation of stress, heartache and lots and lots of tears

So here I am, post graduation McKenzie. 

I still sleep with my stuffed elephant, have Taylor Swift on replay and still find my heart skip a beat when a cute boy favorites my selfie. Wow I have come a long way!!!

Four months of basically summer has made my heart eternally feel more gratitude for a plethora of things (Oh gosh, I sound like, as Jen from TBD would say "that girl who uses big words to make her sound smart but she doesn't make any sense," and here's the thing, Jen is going to law school so she knows what big words mean) that are in my everyday life. 

I feel like there is this theme going around life right now, maybe it is always constantly here and I am just finally getting into the know of things, but I feel as though so many people are not content with where they are. Junior year I could not wait for senior year, senior year I was praying graduation would come faster, graduation comes and I cannot wait to move 9,000 miles away to Malaysia, Malaysia is here and I just cannot stop thinking about moving to Provo and starting school, and I feel like when I am in school I will just want to be done and graduated already, and the cycle continues. I am learning to soak in the now, to be happy now. I used to say to my friends "I will be happy when... he leaves... I leave... this day is over... " and the list continues, but I wish I would have spent more time being happy in the moment rather than waiting to be happy. These moments we experience are meant to be happy, yeah they're tough and sometimes unbearable, but they aren't meant to make us want to shove our bodies under the covers and not come up for air, they are here to be enjoyable. So enjoy the moment you're in, stop waiting for the "when" and start finding "joy in the journey," (do I remind you of your beehive leader yet??) 

Just some thoughts.

xoxo