Nineteen

Creepy

Old

Fergalicious

Crazy

Tough

Lipstick

Baby

Eeeek

Cry

Gross

Cool

Red

Decisions

Commitment

Dance

Laugh

Cringe

Change

Yuck

When I think of 19 those are the words that come to my head. I associate odd things, like to me the time "4am" is like raw meat. I don't know, I am weird and I don't know how to stop being weird. Sometimes I still worry that my mom actually did pay all of the boys who asked me to dances to ask me, but it's okay because I went- so what. 

I have mentioned this before, but the number 19 is so cool to me. Like when I meet people who are 19 they always have beautiful long hair, black nail polish, a smokin' bod and also a boyfriend who rides a motorcycle without a helmet- dreamy. But the other night I was laying in bed and realization struck me that this is my last year as a teen. It is my last year where I can eat ice cream as a meal, my last year where I can really talk about high school, my last year of my youth. I mean it kind of is all downhill from here. Once I hit 20 I feel like the words are "mortgage, kids, decisions, broccoli, grump." I know that is not true, and that life really goes uphill- I am hoping and assuming so, because so many people make it past 19- but the thought of no longer being a teen makes me want to eat my hair. Maybe that will get rid of all of my split ends. Here are 19 things that I will miss about being a teen:

19. Ordering off of the kids menu

18. A teenager metabolism

17. Not being officially moved out

16. Still on my parents insurance

15. My mom schedules my dentist appointments for me

14. Sitting at the kids table at family functions (the kids table has a bad rep, but hey, I can sit at the kids table and eat all of the white bread rolls with butter I want without the disapproving eyes of a grown up)

13. My hardest decisions of the day include what should I eat for lunch and how do I trick Harleigh into letting me braid her hair?

12. I can still have "crushes" on "boys" instead of doing the adult thing and talking to them like a normal human being

11. Eating 4 pieces of pizza and not feeling sick

10. Eating 4 pieces of pizza and then being able to go on a run

9. I can still drag my parents along with me to do "grown up" things, like signing up for school or an apartment

8. Long hair

7. Still having an optimistic outlook on life

6. Colorful nail polish

5. Having time to "do lunch" with friends, like 5 times a day

4. No grown up jobs, kind of

3. Short skirts

2. Bad heels that kill your feet, but I still have the stamina to endure

1. I don't really have to go to singles ward yet

Dear 19 years old, I promise to be brave, I promise to let new challenges scare me but I promise to tackle them, I promise to love the things I love and learn to love the things I hate, I promise I will try to dress better and eat better and speak kinder words, I promise to not be married while I am 19. 19, please be good to me.

xoxo