I have made an executive decision: being a best friend is the toughest job in the world. Well, in my 18 year old nannying world at least. A best friend wears many hats when you're 18. When you're 18 and your world revolves around cute boys and gross school and just trying to make it through the day without another emotional break down, your world is in desperate need of a Meredith Grey to your Cristina Yang, or vice versa.
A best friend wears the cap of a match maker. As your best friend, it is in explicitly written that she must perform wing woman duties when asked upon because no one wants to see a best friend single, also it is just the nice thing to do. This cap of the match maker means you will take selfies looking ugly only to brighten the shine of your bestie in the picture, you will investigate the targets life and find out what he thinks of your BFF while also mentioning tidbits of information that will put your best friend in the best possible light to him, you basically forgo some of your social life for a little to put a bit of happiness in your best friends- it is a sacrifice every best friend has to make. And your best friend will do the same for you, every healthy best friend relationship requires some give and take.
Your best friend wears the hat of a therapist, to give you all of the best advice she or he can muster, to tell you when you are being downright ridiculous, to be a shoulder to cry on when you feel like your heart cannot take anymore. As a therapist you watch your best friend make stupid mistakes with her heart and that stupid boy, and you spoon feed her death wishes upon that boy that crushed her like you will spoon feed her Ben & Jerry's the night of the break up. A part of this hat comes with being an excellent listener, not a good or sub par listener, but an excellent one. Every girl goes through this time in her life, maybe once ever or maybe once a week, but it is what Amber calls a "boy peak," where it seems as though every boy in the universe is into you. Those are awesome times. Those times are like eating a Krispey Kreme doughnut- so scrumptious and desirable in the moment, but once it is gone, you are left feeling like you are about to throw up your whole stomach, from either the donut or the boys. This tends to occur post break up, and when it happens, girls like to gush. Girls love to let other girls know when they are wanted, they like to hear the reactions of "Billy told me I am cute," and "Joe said he wants to take me for a drive to the lake," which by the way Joe is probably a hoe and just wants a backseat make out, but a best friend doesn't say that. A best friend opens her mouth as far as it will go and bugs her eyes out and is interested in every detail of the 12 minute texting conversation you and Joe the hoe had (name courtesy to Paige.) This is one of the challenging time for a best friend, because although best friends are trained to listen to the multiple boy stories, a best friend can only muster up so many different reactions to "Frank Bob Justin Cool Guy told me he thinks my butt is cute, again!!!," so when you are experiencing a boy peak, please gab and gush to your person, but please do not over do it. And as a footnote to being an excellent listener, keeping those secrets your best friend funnels into your mind are tightly sealed with a padlock and you are not to tell a soul. You do not tell a boy, you do not tell your mom, and you certainly under any possible circumstance do not tell another girl. This girl has trusted in you to be her person, her BFF, and you must keep the sacred vow of keeping her secrets like you would like yours to be kept. It is just expected.
Another hat found in a best friends closet is the hat of loyalty, which I feel I gab on all of the time about, but this cute bedazzled baseball cap ;-) of practicing the art of having RBF in defense of your best friend. When it comes to contact with that one person that your best friend will probably be cursing in her grave, you hold your own RBF in support of her. You support her, you hold her hand and her heart in defense of that one person because you are her person- the award for the same words used over and over again in the same sentence goes to me, thank you, I gracefully accept this award and would like to thank my best friends who hold RBF's with me, you keep doing you. You don't have to actually dislike your person's one person, but you do not have to become best friends with your person's one person either. Award number two is in the mail and I am expecting it in 3-8 business days. This subject is a little touchy and a little risky and a little iffy, but basically someone who makes your best friend of all time and eternity feel like they are the scum of the earth, is someone who you will not be inviting to your backyard bbq/slumber party, metaphorically speaking of course.
Friends are important to me. My friends are a part of the reason why I have kept going, why I keep going and why I will keep going in the future. Friends are these little precious gems of goodness that we as humans must cherish, nurture and love because what they give in return is more than our brains can imagine and comprehend. My friends have taught me that people need people, that they will always be there when boys aren't, and that it is okay sometimes to sit in bed and eat pizza with cheese crusts. Everyone needs someone to lay on the floor with them when you're in a tutu and a bikini top and your prom shoes because you miss a boy, that is the kind of person that sticks around for the lowest of the lows, and the kind of person I am grateful for even when I find myself listening to anther's tales of her boy peak.
Be good to friends, friends are fragile.
xoxo
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