Monday, June 8, 2015

Thoughts That Came Into My Head

-forever 21 reminds me of all the people I have never liked
-if there was a human version of flipflops, it would be you
-I feel like summer is country music hate on it
-everyone kind of sucks, you just need to know how much suckiness you can deal with 
-"let's just keep in touch"
-just tryna find a place to wear my prom dress to again
-you're a crappy friend! Just own up to it!
-I just really really love bread ugh
-maroon 5 ugh
-it's so fun running into your favorite person wherever you go
-cute boys make the world go round but also will flip your universe upside down so that's fun
-it's just really cool how we all get different stories of the same situation :-)
-FEELINGS SUCK A LOT
-are you ever just worried things will never be the same
-some days it's okay to not be okay
-cute outfit, how 2007 Disney channel star of you
-things get easier when you decide not to care or show emotion or feel anything actually
-it's just hard to respect others opinions when they have stupid ones

Sunday, June 7, 2015

Kenzie and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

I think about this day lots, the day that will live in infamy in my mind for ages. March 24th. Wowza was that a day. When I am having a particularly bad day, one that a good diet coke and the quote "I'm Prada you're nada" can't cure, I think "well if I endured March 24th then I can tackle anything," or I am able to laugh at how sincerely awful that day was. Either way, that terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day is always coming to mind, and it is kind of funny.
March 24th started out bomb. I mean great. It was my first day at orientation of my DREAM JOB (sales person at Nordstrom, which for me, is like the shining beacon of hope that I have been wishing for for years) anyway, but I had to go to the beginning of school to attend a class to get a 10% bump on my final-which now that I am thinking about it I do not even know if I received that 10% bump and I definitely should have skipped school that day. Anyway, my outfit was super cute and I had on some rockin' bright red lipstick, I felt awesome. In first hour was when it all started, where the cracks that had been appearing in my life started to be more apparent and I could feel them separating letting out all of the hurt. In first hour I found out some devastating news about a boy that I was super into, so that put a slight damper on things. The cracks were open, and it started to hurt. After second hour was done, I had to leave for orientation. Woot woot. I was ecstatic, ecstatic to be leaving school with the people that had hurt me and ecstatic to be off to the first day of my dream. I was rocking out to- I vividly remember this moment- "Sk8r Boi" when my cute little convertible bug started to shake and steam and I had to pull over-while on the 101 by the way- where my car then stopped working and I was stuck. STUCK ON THE FREEWAY ON MY FIRST DAY TO ORIENTATION AFTER HEARING THE (as previously mentioned) WORST NEWS OF MY LIFE. I wanted to cry, I wanted to sob and to crawl under a rock. But I couldn't, I was on my way to my first day of my big girl job so I had to do the big girl thing- call my mom and have my dad come and rescue me. So that's what I did, I didn't cry yet. I couldn't mess up my makeup for my big day.
So anyway I make it to orientation, a little late and frenzied, but still lookin' good. Orientation was great, awesome, I soaked up every second and loved it. And then came lunch, where I had to patch up the activities of that mornings and bam water works. Tears all by myself in the middle of the Scottsdale food court over my panda express- which was disgusting and I didn't even finish by the way. So aside from crying all alone in the food court, messing up my makeup and my ego, I had to shuffle my way back to class and sit in another three hours of orientation with so many events hanging over my head. Now I know I was being very dramatic, but that day was out of a movie. I was almost expecting Warner Brothers to give me a call that afternoon and say "Yes, Ms Kenzie Yee, we heard about your sucky boy situation, your car breaking down on the freeway and also about your breakdown in the food court we would like to make your day into a comedy," but they did not call that afternoon. Instead that afternoon I had to teach piano, and be a little bit sad, and Warner Brothers still has not called. 
Anyway, with this day always hanging over my head, maybe if I did a little (really long) rant about it, it can for sure move on from my memories. Or maybe I will always vividly remember the diet coke I was sipping while I wiped away my tears over my little black iPhone to remind me that if I can tackle March 24th, I can tackle it all. Bring it on. 
(But not really because that day sucked and I really do not think I can emotionally take another March 24th until maybe I am 24 years of age)

Saturday, June 6, 2015

Thoughts That Came Into My Head

*with a side of anger

-FMT if you think boys are dumb
-I love Christmas lights I want Christmas lights in June
-if you need a song to cry to, "Girl Crush" is a great choice
-u r annoying u need to stop being a thing
-don't be the friend that tells friends secrets
-everything gets out :-)
-atleast I have long legs
-it's really fun when you're running late to work and your legs are jello from a workout and you have to MF SPRINT UP THE STAIRS
-if you miss someone tell them, it's useless to play games that gets you nowhere
-don't make promises you can't keep
-you're just a stand up human being!!! Keep doing you!!!!!
-today I am grateful for feelings that stay in the past
-it just kinda sucks when you have a funny moment and the person you wanna share it with doesn't wanna hear it from you
-funny how you're two different people all at one time!!!!
-mediocre
-disappointing 
-soft
-unoriginal
-I JUST WANNA GRAB YOUR FACE AND PLANT ONE ON YA
-maybe stop being such a douche bag and maybe I'll stop subtweeting you :-)

Friday, June 5, 2015

M on M

Fun fact: My real name is McKenzie. And as much as I obsess when people call me "Kenzie" or "Kenz" (!!!!!!) like obsess where my heart melts into a big puddle and I see rainbows and doves, I also obsess over things with my initial on them, M. And lately, a lot of things that happen to begin with my letter have been on my mind. So imma bout to nose dive zoom into them, dissect them one by one ;-)
Memories: Memories are these really fun things that actually can really suck sometimes. Like you can be driving to get some good Krispey Kreme donuts and then you realized that driving up Higley road is like wow memory lane and you remember all of these emotions and times in your life, and you start to (up next) miss someone or something or a time period. Memories can be good, they can be really good. It's the best thing ever to have good memories because those are things that you hold with you forever, but memories are dangerous. If you're taking a little stroll down memory lane, make sure you don't pick out a house and get a mortgage on memory lane because staying in the past does not help anyone.
Missing someone- Missing someone is weird and just a big BLAH. I think we can all agree that missing someone is one of the worst feelings we as humans can experience. I'm not strictly talking about missing a past "love interest" (which hurts like a mother trucker) but I mean missing someone like your dad after he moves out, or a best friend after they move to Utah or even missing someone you have grown apart from. I do not think I could ever not like someone enough that I would wish upon them the hurting feeling of missing someone.
M&M's- K well because of my obsession with my initial, ever since like the beginning of time I have had this fantasy of dating a boy who's name begins with an "M" because then we can BE M&M's FOR HALLOWEEN. I just vision us walking into a really cool Halloween (one of my fav holidays) party and I have a green swing dress with a big white M on it and white go-go boots on, and he has a red t-shirt with an M on it and cute boy shorts on, and wow we would just. That beautiful vision brings tears to my eyes.
Music- I just wanna say that "How to be a heartbreaker" by Marina and the Diamonds is probably the best advice ever and that if anyone is wondering how to handle boys they should probably listen to that bad boy.

Things I Would Rather Be Doing

You know those days where like everything sucks and everyone is annoying and then you are sitting all alone in the food court on your break trying to look cute stuffing your face with pizza, and then you can just think of 47,000 things that you would rather be doing with your time? Today is one of those days. Here's just a quick list of things I would rather be doing or places I would rather be than sitting in this too loud gathering place for annoying people:
-sitting on a beach in Mexico reading a cheesy romance novel that makes me crave a relationship
-holding puppies
-kissing in the rain
-watching Harry Potter
-snuggled up in bed in my fav wildfox sweater and 30 rock playing in the background while I try to beat my high score on 10/10
-sitting at a beach anywhere actually
-reading on the top of the houseboat at Lake Powell
-riding the ferry from balboa island to the fun zone with a frozen banana in my hand
-sweeping my room
-laying on my trampoline under blankets while napping
-holding hands
-watching the finale of Friday night lights
-getting yelled at by Disneyland workers for running to Matterhorn
-running in my new running shorts
-getting a free donut from Krispey Kreme
-telling certain boys they're douche bags and will never find love and that I hope they go bald before the age of 21
It's not 47,000 things buts it's a hella lot of things that sound better than being stuck in this food court.




Thursday, June 4, 2015

Thoughts That Came Into My Head

-sometimes it's just easier to hate someone so you don't let yourself miss them
-if I've never subtweeted you then you probably haven't made an impact in my life
-why is missing people who suck a thing???
-you're so cute it hurts my insides
-bandaids really don't fix bulletholes though
-I JUST WANNA BE BRITNEY SPEARS
-nothing cuter than asking for that late night hook up
-when you've been through so much you actually start to feel numb to emotion hahahahhaaaaaa
-"I'm not like the other guys" yeah you're more of a douche bag!!!!
-idgaf if I sound like a Molly Mormon who wears bubble necklaces and has a shabby chic themed home but being married sounds pretty sweet because literally you have a cuddle buddy every night and that sounds pretty aight
-justifying your actions doesn't make the hurt go away
-I'm just excited to see who the first person from our class is to get engaged
-"Career wise I'm just gonna marry rich and design handbags"
-but bad boys tho
-funny how things change
-my fault is literally liking the person too much hahahahah

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Mercury Is In Retrograde



Mercury is in retrograde.. Still. K wtf universe like stop throwing up on us. Even if you do not believe all of this astrology halabaloo, it is still nice to have something to blame when things are just going crappy-am I right ladies. So basically what happens when Mercury is in retrograde is that Mercury is regressing or something (I don't know an astrologer explained it to me) and basically everything about everything is going to suck and we as humans should lay low, not make plans, and expect the worst. Apparently Mercury has been in retrograde for the past two weeks, so imma bout to drop all of the crappy things that I am blaming on Mercury retrograding.
-One of my very best friends moved to Utah (which I can't blame on the universe but it sucks and Mercury in retrograde sucks)
-Returns at work have been off the wall insane
-Boys have been sucking (as usual) but kind of a lot lately
-My heart got slightly broken
-I realized that from a metal analyst's viewpoint, I probably do have an addiction to shopping/spending money which is really good since I make $9 an hour and have the taste of someone who should be making $900 an hour
-Literally as I am typing this blog post, my computer decides to go wack and reloads the page so the post disappears and I have to restart
-I blew out my tire
-I tripped over a rug at work multiple times in one day in the very tall pair of shoes which are my favorite so there's that
-EVERYONE PLUS THEIR MF DOG HAS A MF BOYFRIEND and maybe that doesn't have anything to do with Mercury is in retrograde but guess what universe, sista over here is kind of upset about that
Atleast Mercury should be done retrograding on June 11th, so I guess I will have to find a new excuse to blame all of my misfortunes on. ;-)